I sat at the computer far too long today, creating a schedule in multiple arrays of the rainbow, demystifying my life of supposed spontaneity; creating color-coded blocks of time for all of our activities during the day. Reality check: I will not be awaking at dawn for that “early morning run with the dog” to cover two bases, if not one slightly saggin’ booty (that’d be the dog’s, people). However, the skinny jeans are still in the closet – until I can grab more color chunks for gym time.

It’s fascinating to me that all these “time saving” techniques in my life (computer), seem to add more things to do (calendar, FB, IM), and more details that I need to arrange in a row like balancing skittles on paper, before I can effectively remember where I’m supposed to be, and what I “should be” doing at any given moment. Half the time, I need a reference sheet to know where I am; is that wrong? What day is it today? That, my friends: that is a mommy. It secretly stands for Making Offspring Makes Moreworkfor You. (Yes, it’s really one word now.  ‘Cause I said so.)

Luckily, the crack-berries and iLeashes help us remember what we are supposed to do and where at any given second. And with reminders, to boot. I call it my mommy leash. It’s a matter of keeping it together, staying on top of your schedule skittles (without eating too many of them) and remembering that by the end of the day, you’ll need to let a lot of it go.

Of course, at the end of the day, that’s why the universe and/or God gave us wine. Oh yeah, and reality TV; ’cause at least you have someone to feel better than half-way through mommy’s night-time bottle.

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